ramblings from me and the wall

 

Today is Wednesday, I'm still not used to going to the therapist on Wednesday it kind of messes up my whole week just that little change. The teacher called back that wanted us to speak to his class tomorrow saying that he forgot the schedule change so now somehow we agreed to do all his classes on Tuesday instead of the two classes that is a lot of classes and we are idiots for agreeing to it poor Olsen

We are really tired I think we are going to take our medicine and go to bed really soon one disadvantage of being multiple is never being able to truly take a vacation you're all stuck together whether you want to be or not and it stinks totally

and no one gets paid for their service's no retirement fund, no overtimepay and no sick time totally unfair what did we do to deserve this? Abuse to be abused again, over and over and over there is no way to leave it. There is no way to leave us and there is no way to leave the people that hurt us because they are burned in our memory and in our minds are pictures that we see. They Affect our body our ability to function our energy our dreams and our nightmares why are we holding certain ones off maybe they are right maybe they have the right idea? Okay so things happen so what? Move on already! Why are we being tortured? Seeing it, hearing it and feeling? Personally I want out!

Whoever I am, I am not me I am not you I am nothing no one no where invisible no one sees me no one knows me no one hears me just i am here, when you need me but yet I am not free I am stuck in the body that I don't want people that I don't like against my will I am here there is no fear there is just hate because there's no escape never forever I'm here even though I thought I had disappeared it was a cruel joke that no one spoke until I found myself once again. I will never be your friend, I was never meant to be a friend, to be understood or cared about, just part of the wall that broke now there are too many holes too much to unfold, this is not what was suppose to happen this is not what I want, but no one cares so why should I? the one who is not enough to have a name part of the numb ppl