what to do, here i am again

I dont understand why i am so tired, slept lots.want to eat but won't. I am just an idiot. Watching the Biggest looser on TV. just what i need to be watching. I just crave to be small, so small so i can wear what ever i want, and in my warped brain so ppl will like me more. feel like ppl are just gonna blow inside. Its only a matter of time. Part of me doesnt care in the slightest, sometimes I get so tired of being "nice" I know thats weird, but I have always been the nice one. actually, i think, there is another group inside, and i am just so frigging sick of this. i dont wanna deal with anything else. enough for now ?????